Welcome to Attention Addicts Anonymous

The world's most famous anonymous meeting.

Trump wants headlines. Elon wants replies. MrBeast wants views. They all answer to Al Gorithm.

Attention is the drug. Al Gorithm is the dealer.

$AAA · Contract TBA · Unofficial parody

Al Gorithm presides over a fast-food booth of attention-addicted public figures.

Live confessions

  • MEMBER 001 — ELON: Hi, I'm Elon. It's been seven minutes since my last post.
  • MEMBER 002 — TRUMP: I don't have an attention problem. My attention is tremendous.
  • MEMBER 003 — MRBEAST: I gave 1,000 people attention.
  • MEMBER 004 — KIM: Wait—are we filming this?
PLEASE, AL. ONE MORE IMPRESSION. ★ EVERYONE IS FAMOUS UNTIL AL STOPS SHOWING THEM. ★ THEY RUN THE WORLD. AL RUNS THE FEED. ★ YOU DON'T FOLLOW AL. AL DECIDES WHO GETS FOLLOWED. ★ PLEASE, AL. ONE MORE IMPRESSION. ★ EVERYONE IS FAMOUS UNTIL AL STOPS SHOWING THEM. ★ THEY RUN THE WORLD. AL RUNS THE FEED. ★ YOU DON'T FOLLOW AL. AL DECIDES WHO GETS FOLLOWED. ★

Live from the meeting

The Attention Board

Give attention to people who clearly don't have enough.

You get five stars every 24 hours. Spend them irresponsibly.

Your attention today:

5 of 5 attention stars remaining

Resets at 00:00 UTC. Emotional recovery may take longer.

  1. 01Elon MuskSEVEN MINUTES CLEAN00 stars this week
  2. 02Donald TrumpRECOVERY IS TREMENDOUS00 stars this week
  3. 03MrBeastGAVE 1,000 PEOPLE ATTENTION00 stars this week
  4. 04Kim KardashianASKED IF THIS WAS FILMED00 stars this week
  5. 05Kanye WestAPPEALING HIS SHADOWBAN00 stars this week

Al Gorithm chairs the meeting and cannot receive attention. He already has yours.

The mechanism

How this works

01

Admit it

You opened the app without knowing why.

02

Give it

Spend five daily stars on someone who clearly needs more.

03

Watch it

The board reshuffles in real time. Ego is the only utility.

Al Gorithm: a caricature of Al Gore as the human embodiment of the algorithm, pressing a red BOOST button in front of server racks.

Chairman · Dealer · Sponsor

Meet Al Gorithm

Al Gore didn't invent the internet. Al Gorithm invented the feed.

He chairs the meetings, controls the reach, and decides whose face you will be tired of tomorrow.

By day, he treats attention addiction. By night, he changes the algorithm.

"You don't follow Al. Al decides who gets followed."

Do not press this.

Attendance is anonymous. Screenshots are mandatory.

Upcoming AAA meetings

Meeting #001 archive photograph: the last scroll.

ARCHIVED

MEETING #001 — THE LAST SCROLL

Location
24/7 FAST-FOOD BOOTH
Topic
Surviving seven minutes without posting.

WAITLIST OPEN

MEETING #002 — THE SHADOWBAN SUPPORT CIRCLE

Location
SOMEWHERE BELOW THE FOLD
Topic
Coping when nobody is being shown your post.

COMING SOON

MEETING #003 — THE MAIN CHARACTER INTERVENTION

Location
YOUR REPLIES
Topic
What to do when the discourse moves on.

Evidence

Meeting minutes

What happens in AAA stays permanently indexed.

MEETING #001 — THE LAST SCROLL
CHAIRMAN AL GORITHM
OFFICIAL MEETING BADGE

MEETING FOOTAGE WITHHELD BY THE ALGORITHM.

MEETING FOOTAGE WITHHELD BY THE ALGORITHM.

NEXT RELAPSE PENDING.

NEXT RELAPSE PENDING.

Application for algorithmic consideration

Request a seat

No promises. Al decides who gets in.

0 attention addicts are waiting for attention.

Classified meeting documents

FAQ

Is this affiliated with any of these people?

Absolutely not. They have enough attention already.

What does $AAA do?

It turns attention into more attention. Ego is the only utility.

When is the token live?

When the verified contract address replaces TBA. Never trust an address posted anywhere else.

Can I join a meeting?

Request a seat. Al decides.

Is this financial advice?

No. It is barely emotional advice.

Admit you have a problem.

The first step is giving us your attention.